I am looking to be criticed

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I am looking to be criticed

Postby firegerry648 » Mon Mar 28, 2005 5:36 pm

I can only work in 24 bit at the moment..my appologies. I keep getting told by people that know me that I do good work. I think this is the most approprite place to get honest comments...Thank you for your time looking at it.

<img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v672/gerry648/Comicbooks/wd_15_cov_600startcopyMedium.jpg" alt="Image hosted by Photobucket.com">
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Postby Soto » Mon Mar 28, 2005 7:40 pm

Wow.
That's a very... pirmary piece.
Quite honestly, I think there's just too many colors going on here.
The red/orange/yelow ground, and the bright green foliage and bright blue sky...
It's all just a little rich, and kinda detracts from the focus of the piece, I think. The first thing I noticed was the bright blue sky, with that line from the upper left corner, and then I scrolled down, and saw the ground. I completely glossed over the guy on the bike. Not to say that I didn't see him, but he seemed almost secondary to the piece. If you calm the piece down in earth tones, and maybe treat the sky with more subtle blue and yellow tones, it might be a better foundation for maybe making the guy's jacket a rich saddle brown or black, and the bike a bright red. That way the focus is on the guy and his bike, instead of the background elements. If you take a more natural approach (in terms of palette), everything should fall into place.

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Postby Tony Moore » Tue Mar 29, 2005 3:21 pm

i agree with everything that Soto said. the color scheme is all over the place, and day-glo primary at that. mute some of the colors to push the background back, and keep an eye on the light source. you can always play the highlights of one object off the shadows of what it overlaps to push the feeling of space within the pic.

also, that angle gradient is killing the sky.

Try to base your developed color scheme off just a couple main colors to keep them harmonious. when all else fails, google image search some pictures of skies and nature or whatever to give yourself some color cues.

as Soto said, take on a more natural pallette and everything else will fall together. as long as the color choices are really strong, the rendering itself can and actually should be secondary.

-T
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Postby firegerry648 » Tue Mar 29, 2005 4:51 pm

Thank you for your comments and suggestions, I;m already giving it another try using a more natural pallet.

Thanks again
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Hope this one is better

Postby firegerry648 » Wed Mar 30, 2005 8:31 am

I tried to use a more natural pallet this time. and I shifted the focus in my opinion to the Bike and rider.

<img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v672/gerry648/wd_15_cov_600_2ndcopyLarge.jpg" alt="Image hosted by Photobucket.com">
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Postby Randy » Wed Mar 30, 2005 11:11 am

Yay! I like the second one much better!

Actually, after just seeing the first one, I was going to suggest a strategy used by a painting (traditional) teacher in college: Learn values and contrasts first by doing a "monochromatic" painting, just use one color and white (or different shades of the one color). We always started with a burnt umber, a dark orangey brown. On the next attempt, add only a couple of colors to the pallette, say black and blue, or maybe green. Repeat, gradually adding more colors.

The point was to learn to color light and shadow tones without depending on the color itself. That way, if it's night outside everything may be in shades of blue or violet. If it's a bright sunny day everything has a golden cast, even the sky.

But I can see you made a nice jump from the first to the second. Good job!
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Postby firegerry648 » Wed Mar 30, 2005 11:43 am

The first one was a suggestion by a friend. I wasn't thrilled with it..the second one is my normal style...thank you for your post
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Postby Nathan » Wed Mar 30, 2005 12:04 pm

The only thing you have rendered is the clouds and trees a bit and neither is really working, IMO. I'd like to see you try going back to them. Then I'd like to see you render the rest of the page, especially the figure and bike. The palette is much better now, BTW.
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Postby firegerry648 » Wed Mar 30, 2005 12:08 pm

Any suggestions on the clouds and tees...?????

I thought the clouds looked ok..still hacking at the trees ... and the rest of it
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Postby Zombie Dave McCaig » Wed Mar 30, 2005 6:50 pm

Hi Gerry, I like your color choices in #2 as well. I don't really have a problem with the trees, but agree about the clouds. My only advice would be to google up some cloud photo ref. Those saturated strokes around the edges make the clouds look unnatural. My suggestion would be to either drop them in flat, or maybe to indicate the shadow side with a light grey/blue?
Last edited by Zombie Dave McCaig on Sat Apr 02, 2005 12:48 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Hope this one is better

Postby Struble » Wed Mar 30, 2005 9:15 pm

Gerry,

I believe the reason why the clouds and trees aren't working is because they are more rendered than the figure and the motorcycle. All that extra detail draws the eyes towards them instead of the focal point of the image.

Also, you might want to adjust the contrast between the figure/motorcycle and the background a little bit. As it is now, he's kind of blending into the trees. Asjusting the contrast between these colours will help pop him a bit and thus draw the eye towards him.

Sh.
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Postby firegerry648 » Sat Apr 02, 2005 3:21 am

Thank you all again and I am still working on making this image better. I am doing my best ot incorperate all of your suggestions. Your time and comments are greatly appreciated.
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Lets go for try 3

Postby firegerry648 » Sat Apr 02, 2005 4:23 pm

Image
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Postby Tony Moore » Sat Apr 02, 2005 8:39 pm

i think you're still missing it with the clouds.

while the gradient that made the sky in the first one was really not working, the rendering of the clouds themselves within that sky were actually the best of all the versions you've posted so far.

those saturated lines around the edges look really weird and unnatural, like neon tubes outlining the shape of the clouds. I recommend dropping them in flat like Dave suggested, maybe with a slight gradient inside them to shade them a bit without overrendering them.

-T
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Re: Lets go for try 3

Postby Struble » Sat Apr 02, 2005 10:30 pm

Getting closer, buckeroo.

Here is a quick repaint to to articulate better than we can with words. Do something simple on the clouds... such as:

Image

Also, just a suggestion, but you might want to try doing something to denote the spokes on that front tire -- curently it looks like the front of the bike is magically floating in my mind. In my little demo picture, all I did was mix in 50% of the grey you used in the center with the colours behind the spokes. You can go with something as simple as this because of the blurring effect that the tire spinning is giving them.

Okay, hope that helps.

Sh.
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